A former soldier says coaching his son’s football team is helping him recover from complex-Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Matthew Evans, 40, did 21 years’ Army service and seven military tours including in Iraq and Afghanistan. After returning home he wanted to take his own life and was admitted to hospital because of his PTSD.
Son Ollie, 11, is a Veterans Awards finalist for helping his dad through his recovery. The pair practice every week on the pitch near their home in Abercanaid, a village near Mr Evan’s home in Merthyr Tydfil, often joking their way through football drills. Midfielder and winger Ollie is trying to sharpen his skills ahead of trials with League Two club Newport County’s academy.
Mr Evans said his bond with Ollie was the reason behind why the ex soldier could recover from extreme lows.
“He’s gone through the journey that I have with my mental health and this is like a release for me really as much as him,” he said.
He started coaching in the army, and then after discharge worked for Aldershot FC. The family moved home to Abercanaid in August, where Mr Evans works as an army recruitment sergeant and a Newport County AFC academy coach. He was 16 when he joined the army at Pontypridd Register Office.
He served in the 1st Battalion of the Welsh Guards, rising to the rank of platoon sergeant, and left in September 2021. He did tours in Northern Ireland, Iraq, Bosnia, Afghanistan, plus exercises in Kenya and the United States. He said it had given him “loads of life skills” but had also taken its toll.
“I don’t think anyone can have the real picture of what you do see and things you’ve seen” he said.
“You go out and you don’t know if you’re going to come back in.”
In January 2020, while an instructor for the reserves, he began experiencing symptoms of complex post-traumatic stress disorder. His mental health deteriorated and he spent six weeks in hospital due to self-harming.
“What my family went through I would never wish on anyone” he said, adding: “I have days where I am not a nice person to be around.”
Despite everything, he said he was one of the lucky ones because he came forward to seek help. With the help of wife Roshelle and sons Morgan, 23, Joe, 18 and Ollie, he was able to learn coping techniques.
“If something does happen, fireworks and things like that, there’s been times where I’ve been upset and crying on the floor and things, and just curl up in a ball and hide from it.”
Throughout it all, Ollie supports his dad.
“Everybody’s got to look after somebody they love, and when he was ill I looked after him because he had to stay in the house,” Ollie said.
This time of year the bangs and flashes of bonfire night are difficult. Ollie said he stays in with his dad, turning up the telly and closing the door and getting his noise cancelling headphones. He added: “When we watch movies and there’s guns, when sometimes I forget, he starts having problems, like his head and all of that, so now I mute it so then he’s perfectly fine.”
It was on the pitch, coaching Ollie and older brother Joe, where Mr Evans says he could forget everything.
“I think sometimes he doesn’t understand how much he’s helped me,” he added.
He nominated Ollie for a Veteran’s Children’s Award Cymru, and his son is a finalist in the contribution to sport under-11 category. He sees his son as a “hero”, and the feeling is mutual. Mr Evans had this advice for anyone struggling with PTSD: “You need to have something positive in your life.”
Source: BBC.com